Finding Inner Rest in an Unrested World: How to Reclaim Stillness When Everything Feels Too Much
There is no denying that we live in a world that often feels deeply unrested.
The pace of our lives is relentless, the state of the world may feel overwhelming, and our attention seems pulled in a myriad of directions from the moment we wake up until we fall asleep at night.
The world beats to the rhythm of urgency.
So it’s likely that we all experience moments where it feels like we are living on fast-forward, feeling overstimulated, thinly stretched, and out of sync with our own pace and rhythms.
One of the themes that arises most often in my conversations with women is a deep and almost vital yearning for a sense of ‘inner rest’: a way to exhale, catch our breath and integrate moments of stillness and peace in our lives. An ability to anchor in a sense of stillness within, regardless of the storms constantly playing out in the outer world.
In this blog post, I explore the body’s natural tidal waves of action and rest and why they get interrupted, why cultivating inner rest is vital for us in an unrested world, different flavours of rest, and how we can integrate them in our life to resource ourselves in an unrested world.
Our body’s Natural Tidal Waves
Our bodies, like the tides, are designed to move in rhythms of action and rest. These waves naturally guide us through periods of effort, followed by periods of recovery.
These tidal waves help us to meet the ebbs and flows of life, and to keep our inner capacity replenished as we navigate them.
But in today’s world, these natural rhythms are often interrupted.
Instead of flowing between action and rest, many of us get stuck in the doing - pushing, striving, and staying “always on” to keep up with the pace of the world we live in.
The result? Exhaustion, disconnection, and a deep longing for a refuge we may not even realise we need (until we reach breaking point).
Punctuating our lives with moments of rest is vital to allow our body space for recovery.
Why Rest Gets Interrupted
Our body is beautifully designed to navigate life’s challenges. When faced with stress, our nervous system kicks into action (heart racing, breath quickening, muscles tensing) to prepare us to fight, flee, or freeze.
This is a wise response that protects us when danger is imminent.
But in today’s society, the “threats” we are exposed to aren’t predators in the wild. They are emails, deadlines, challenging conversations and endless social media notifications.
Unlike our ancestors, we rarely have a chance to pause and reset.
Our body doesn’t get the signal that the danger has passed, which means that we stay in overdrive.
Over time, this constant activation takes its toll and leaves us feeling depleted and stuck in survival mode.
Inner rest interrupts this cycle.
When we pause to breathe a little more deeply or slowly or to connect with our senses, we send a signal to our body which says: “you are safe”, “it’s ok to pause and rest”.
This simple act activates the parasympathetic nervous system, and allows us to return to a state of greater calm, balance, and repair.
It enables us to ride the tidal wave all the way through.
Inner Rest Is A Reclamation Of Choice
When we think of rest, we often imagine a long sleep or a week-long vacation.
These are amazing, but for the purpose of this blog post, ‘inner rest’ refers to something a little different.
It is the practice of pausing, turning our attention inward (even for a moment), and noticing glimmers of the quietness that lives beneath the surface of our busy minds and busy lives.
It’s a practice of grounding in our own presence.
And it requires us to be still.
Integrating these moments of rest in our lives is a choice.
For most of us, it isn’t something that the world naturally offers, so we need to reclaim it intentionally - because we know these moments will contribute to creating the kind of life we desire to live and the inner state we long to be in more often.
As Viktor Frankl, Austrian neurologist, psychologist and philosopher who survived the unimaginable experience of being in concentration camps, wrote in Man’s Search For Meaning:
"Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of human freedoms : to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way."
What Cultivating Inner Rest Can Look Like
Cultivating inner rest can come in many forms.
Years ago, when I had a long commute and two small children at home, instead of planning my day or reading my emails as I stood on packed trains, I would close my eyes for a few moments, listen to soothing music, take a few breaths and meditate for a short while. It helped me to resource myself for the day or evening ahead.
We all have our unique ways to cultivate inner rest. Here are a few “flavours” of rest and how they can be integrated into our life:
Micro-Pauses
Sometimes, rest is about finding stillness in the tiniest of moments. If you are feeling overwhelmed by the idea of being still, this may be a good place to start:
Pause and Breathe: Set a timer for one minute. Inhale deeply, exhale slowly, and notice how your body feels. Pay attention to the sensations of your breath as it enters and leaves your body - imagine that you are breathing for the very first time.
Anchor in the Moment: When your mind feels scattered, look around and tune to your senses. Name three things you can see, hear, and feel around you. And linger in those sensations.
Create Micro-Sanctuaries: Whether it’s a favourite chair, a cosy corner with a scented candle, or five minutes in your car, find a space that feels restful and make it yours.
These practices might feel small, but their benefits accumulate. Each one is a small rebellion and helps us return to a more inner rested state.
And of course, these small moments can fit anywhere, anytime.
Longer Moments of Stillness
Sometimes we long for longer moments of stillness. This could look like:
Taking a quiet walk in nature, letting the rhythm of our footsteps ground us.
Spending 10 minutes on a bench in a park observing nature around us, noticing our experience through all of our senses, and allowing our body to simply be.
Practicing yoga nidra to be guided into a profound state of relaxation and restoration.
Scanning our body slowly from head to toe, paying attention to the richness of the sensations that are present.
There isn’t a one size-fits-all approach, cultivating inner rest may look different for each of us.
What matters is that these moments involve a sense of inner connection. Whether we are lying still, sitting on a bench or practicing gentle mindful movement - we are consciously paying attention to the sensations of our experience in that moment.
I like to think of them as ways to call ourselves home, and pathways to the inner stillness we are yearning for in our fast-paced, always-on lives.
Anchoring Our Life In Rest
Anchoring my life in rest has become incredibly important to me - I know it impacts everything I do and everyone I meet.
Over the years, I have learned to create a rhythm and tone of rest in my life, that feels like home - an anchor I can return to.
When I deliver workshops or training, I am often asked what my daily practices are. They vary depending on the season, my life and the practices that I find most joyful, resourcing and supportive at that particular time.
But what I know, is that I am happiest, and most grounded when I intentionally create a container for each day that signals a rest tone to my nervous system and cultivates a sense of inner stability.
It means bookending my day with inner rest : starting and ending the day mindfully, in stillness, with a moment of self-connection.
These moments set the tone: they remind me to slow down, breathe, and truly be IN my life.
As I mentioned earlier, there isn’t a one-size fits all approach, it is whatever feels most restful and helpful for you.
Here are a few reflection prompts to explore your own flavour of rest:
Take a few deep breaths and ask yourself:
What does inner rest feel like to me? What is the tone of inner rest in my body?
Where/when in my life do I feel the greatest sense of inner rest, calm and grounding?
What helps me to cultivate this inner stillness and rest?
What type of rest would feel most nourishing to me right now?
What small moments could I reclaim to cultivate a rest tone in my life?
Experiment: Choose one practice to try today. It might be a one-minute pause, a short yoga nidra, or simply sitting quietly with your tea. Notice how it feels in your body.
Reflect and Tweak: Reflect on your experience. What did you notice? How might you bring more of this kind of rest into your life?
An Invitation to Go Deeper
If you are longing for a life that feels softer, more grounded, and restful - if you are committed to cultivating inner rest in an unrested world, there are several ways I can support you.
From personal online Mini Rest Retreats to the Anchored In Rest personal coaching programme, and Unhurried Rest Journey, I can help you explore what it means to live a more rested life for YOU.
Together, we will uncover what stands in the way of rest, create practices that nourish your body, mind, and soul, and help you find inner rest in an unrested world.
To explore what would best support you, get in touch here.
Even in an unrested world, you have the power to choose stillness. To choose ease. To choose you.
